Mood: Scarlet

                            

Scarlet

Saturday night. You’re cruising with your girl-friends somewhere on the highway. Speeding. The wind blows so fiercely it kind of transcends you. Makes your mind travel. Where are you? You keep asking yourself. Where have you drifted off to? The girls are all giggling about something random. Girly talk. Boys, drinking, celebrities, video games, music. You’re elsewhere. Where are you? Greenford. You’re cruising now with your other girl-friend. Somewhere in the outskirts of London. Saturday night, again. Magic is playing on the radio. Soothing, healing, heart songs. The lights are dim, glistening in the foggy night. The air is crispy and gentle. The smells, oh those wonderful smells that encircle your soul. The smell of freshly poured rain on the grass. The oxygen from the trees. Those full bush healing trees. It makes you dream of when you will fall in love. The possibility of a lover, kissing you, holding you. Now you’re back in this smaller highway thinking that you did fall in love, you did try to taste it all. The lover you so dreamt of is nothing but a ghost. A memory. So? Was that it? Is that all? Was it enough? Nothing is ever enough. You always want more. You can never be caged. The word ‘restless’ echoes in your mind: Thailand, Indonesia, Japan, Korea, New York, Granada, Andalusia, Monaco, Tenerife, Johannesburg, Morocco, Oslo, San Francisco, Alaska, Vancouver, Peru, Chile, Argentina, Cuba, Florence, Venice, Naples, Bern, Antwerp, Bavaria, Austria, Marseilles, Lyon, Lisbon...you’re drifting, again, you're drifting... Everywhere. Your heart needs so much it feels like bursting. The giggles bring you back to life. That lonely highway. The lover who’s coming your way. The touch of his hands. It’s all a dream. A wild possibility. A lustful yearning. You don’t remember what it feels like; the caress, the softness, the tenderness, that wanton gaze that it takes your breath away, that it almost makes you feel complete. You’re never complete. You know that. There will always be something...missing. That beautiful void. Insatiable. The only thing that keeps you alive is the flawless love of your pet. Yes, not ideal. But wholesome, somehow. You know this world will never change. But you hold on hope. Tomorrow is another day. Another day to smile, or get mad, or even dream of the possibility of his kiss. Tomorrow is another day. To think how royally you miss the life you could have/should have/ had. Is there still time…tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock. The car’s stopped now. The breeze has turned rough and unkind. You move on. Drinks, laughter, girls. Friends. Love. Life. Your.Heart.Is.Full.

                         

          

Aidan Hawken - Walking Blind